Changing Habits and Why Willpower Never Works
I have been reading an excellent book titled the "Happiness Advantage" and last night it touched upon something I had not expected. The book is generally about how being happy is much better in business and in life than not being happy.
But last night the author Shawn Achor described how during one of his lectures a man stood up and asked him, "isn't this all just common sense." It was an awkward moment for Shawn but he worked his way through it. After the lecture he was informed that the individual who had made the comment was in fact one of the most negative people in the company. It may have been obvious, but not obvious enough to this guy.
Comment sense doesn't mean common action.
Knowledge is only part of the battle. Without action, common sense doesn't help, which would explain why 44% of doctors are overweight and don't take the same advice they give their patients.
80% of people break their New Year's resolutions. Therefore, why is changing our out behavior so hard and how can we make it easier.
I have personally struggled to lose weight and I have all of the motivation and willpower to carry this out, yet years later, I am still at the same 25 lbs. overweight I have always been. Why?
William James, brother of Henry James the famous writer, penned the phrase "we are mere bundles of habits," which is actually a good thing. It prevents our brains from making thousands of decisions every day, such as "should I wear clothes to work, should I brush my teeth." Our habits do these things instinctively and allow our brains to concentrate on things that are more important.
What this means is that we need to make changes in our lives by turning them into habits; otherwise, we will fall back into our old routine - our old habits. We need to train our brains. When I played the violin for the first time, it sounded like crap because my neuron pathways in my brain were slow and ineffective…but as I continue to practice my brain begins to understand what I am trying to accomplish and it makes my fingers and bow hand move quicker and more efficiently. Habits form when we train our brain to the new way of doing things.
Willpower will always fail as a reason to make a change. The more we use it, the less effective willpower becomes. In the past when I used willpower to lose weight I no longer have willpower or mental energy to do anything else. The path of least resistance then took over, and we follow whatever is the easiest. Having to cook low calorie foods is much harder than ordering a cheeseburger at MacDonald's. The path of least resistance always wins out. So, what to do I need to do to change this?
For me to lose weight I need to plan in advance, and I need to have healthy snacks and foods at the ready. Then when I feel the need to eat something, the healthy stuff will be readily available. I need to make it harder for myself to continue with the old habit while I work on a new one - eating healthy and losing the weight. I can rid my fridge of all the things that I shouldn't eat and only have things I can or should eat. I need to keep no cash in my wallet so I can't go and buy chips and burgers. At least until I have trained my brain in the new habit of eating healthy and low calorie.
Standing for an hour practicing my violin seems so difficult. If I start with 15 minutes a day instead, this small change is easier to do and will begin to make a positive change in my habits. Soon I can go to 20 minutes, then 30 and 45 and before long carrying out a 1 hour practice will be a given.
As well, if I surround myself every day with healthy low calorie foods and make getting unhealthy and high calories foods harder to obtain, my body and brain will naturally go to the path of least resistance, which is to eat healthy and low calorie. As long as I don't ever deny myself a burger or a piece of pie or a Tim Horton's coffee, then I won't feel compelled to sabotage my new habit.
Make little changes until you are satisfied with your progress, and then increase your change a little more at a time.
I'll let you know if it works.
